Most of my photos look better enlarged - just click on the photo to do this



Sunday 1 November 2015

Thoughts on Motherhood

When I sat knitting these tiny lace trimmed moccasins whilst pregnant 35 years ago I had no idea what being a mother might entail.  I was not paying attention when mothering skills were being dished out but even had I been I doubt I would have believed some of  the necessary attributes I would need.
  
 
For example I didn't know I would need to be a good actor if  I was to encourage my child to do things she wanted to do whilst inside I wanted to say No don't go there stay home with Mummy where you will be safe!!  As some of you will know I spoke of this back here when the Wanderer wanted to go off to Australia and I am having to do it again now that she is in Nepal and has e-mailed to say she has booked her chosen trek leaving Kathmandu on 5th November for 18 days.  I climb Island Peak and go to Everest base camp, I will be with young Swedish guy for most of the trip, we meet some more people at Island Peak base camp who we will climb with and then from there just me and my guide to Everest base camp. My reply:  Glad you have got a trek booked OK and hope it will prove to be interesting as well as challenging  I have looked up Island Peak - certainly challenging alright but what memories you will have if you make it!  When what I wanted to say was along the lines of come back right now especially once I had checked out the websites here and here. 


Can the tiny shoes in the above photo once have belonged to the young woman who flew off on Friday by herself to Nepal with a backpack and a pair of hiking boots!  I gather that she met up with some Australians who came from Melbourne, not far from where Mr M's sister and her family live, and went out to dinner with them.  They however have gone off on their trek today leaving the Wanderer to make other new friends.

I met up with an old friend in Bath on Friday and we spoke about our children and said that nobody ever tells you that the tiny little baby in your arms might one day enjoy travelling alone like the Wanderer or like my friend's son join the RAF and have to go to war zones if he is sent or they might want to be and do all sorts of things which we as mothers perceive as dangerous but we have to let them go and all the while encourage them to follow their own dreams even if it means that the sleepless nights we expected when they were babies will never really end as they will always be our "babies"!

12 comments:

  1. I guess so many of us will respond with heartfelt comments....been there too! Not it's grandchildren one worries about as they trek up and down mountains, travel the world etc. Not easy.

    ReplyDelete
  2. The best and hardest job in the world...being a mother!
    Lovely post Jane, it's how we all feel!
    V x

    ReplyDelete
  3. Someone said to me just before my first was born, you never stop being a mother. I think it is true I am lucky to still have both my parents alive and I know that they are still so important to me despite the fact that I have lived independently of them longer than I lived with them. I dread the day they leave home but for now I will treasure all my time :). Thinking of you .

    ReplyDelete
  4. I feel for you so much! I just think that it is a double achievement on your part - to have brought her up to be a marvellously adventurous and outward looking person, and to never let on how much you worry!

    ReplyDelete
  5. A poignant post as this is our eldest daughter's birthday. Those tiny feet grow into bigger shoes and dreams and plans grow alongside. Mothers always want their children close by, I think, and free from danger. It's hard to let go and let them fly. I hope your daughter has a wonderful time and comes home with tales of adventure.

    ReplyDelete
  6. No one ever tells you how tough parenthood is going to be - for the rest of your life. The setting free and letting go is the greatest reward for your child, and the hardest challenge for you.
    I hope the Wanderer has a wonderful, enriching time.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I am finding it hard to 'let go' Jane. My son is 17 and needing me less and less. I remember reading that you have to give them roots to grow and wings to fly. Your Wanderer sounds like a confident young woman. You have done a good job! x

    ReplyDelete
  8. what a lovely thoughtful post. Great idea to show the tiny shoes- will you be showing the hiking boots later? C x

    ReplyDelete
  9. It seems this mothering struggle goes beyond geographical borders. We have all had similar experiences, especially with our girls. Mine did the Everest trek a few years ago, I hated every second she was away, she came through it and looks back on it now as one of the greatest achievements in her life. Go figure !

    ReplyDelete
  10. This post has struck a chord! Thank you for posting it.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Yes! Always my baby boy and baby girl... (35 & 38!). I remember being a mother for the first time, crash course in mothering, I'll say! They did survive though. You have a very adventurous daughter, very brave. I think I would be thinking the same thoughts as you. (Love the little booties and shoes, I have my little one's also). Life seemed so simple back then compared to now.

    ReplyDelete
  12. I think she may have her mother's wanderlust and taste for independent travel. You may do your trips in the UK but there are a lot of 'like mother, like daughter' comparisons here Jane. I think you've instilled this taste for independent adventure into her DNA and whilst I know you can't help worrying I expect she'll come back with some great experiences to share with you both. I wish her well!

    ReplyDelete

Thank you for visiting and I hope you have found what you read of interest. Do please leave a comment as I love to hear what you think.